Author Archives: gryeo

What matters more is whether I did what I could. No one knows the outcome. But whether I did what I was capable of— that matters deeply to me. More than results or society’s judgment, what I think of myself is more important. That feels more absolute. Society’s views and evaluations can change at any time. Things like voting, protecting the environment, protecting life, and doing good deeds— they are all like that.

The conclusion will most likely be meaningless in the end. Everything is relative. Everything is cyclical. Or perhaps the universe was created once and that’s the end? Maybe it’s a simulated world created by someone. Maybe it was created by God. Whatever the answer is, the conclusion will likely feel empty and trivial. In the end, what truly interests us is the process of discovering it— the journey of uncovering that hidden truth. Life is probably the same. We will all eventually die. Nothing will remain. In truth, I didn’t exist, then I appeared as if by chance, and will disappear again. What matters is the process of living in between— not the beginning or the end, but the act of living itself. We have to give meaning to that process. That’s the part that is truly interesting.

The illusion that everyone else is pushing themselves to the point of bleeding and near death The illusion that this is how it should be when you’re young And that it’s okay to live like that I lived like that, and I ended up getting cancer I think it was because I failed to manage my stress I was really under extreme stress But I thought it was okay There are probably many people like me Who end up getting seriously ill or even dying There is no age where it’s okay to suffer like that So if I feel it’s hard, then it’s hard I have to go at my own pace, with my own rhythm Doing your best even at the cost of your health, as others say? That’s their standard I need to find my own best way A way to go farther, steadily, for a longer … →

The space of the universe and time as well are all relative There must be something beyond the universe The time in which our universe is created and disappears might be just one second to someone That everything is relative does not mean our lives are insignificant Rather, it means that my own standard becomes an absolute standard for me What I give meaning to has absolute meaning That alone is enough So even the life of a frog in a well or a goldfish in a fishbowl is not insignificant

When someone dies at a young age, we feel sorrow When someone dies at an old age we try to accept it It is received more gently Both socially and personally, it tends to be that way Death is not accepted the same way by everyone nor is it perceived the same In the end, the fear and dread of death might be something humans have created Even if instinctive fear cannot be avoided compared to now, it can be accepted much, much less fearfully I think this is a hint, a clue, or a basis for an answer that how we perceive death is truly important In fact, living beings try to avoid death not because they fear it but because acting that way increases the probability of survival Those that tried to avoid it are the ones that have survived until now But in the end, all living … →

When I was young, I was scared of it The idea that I would disappear forever But now, I’m not really afraid of death Because even that emptiness, that fear Even the “me” who would feel it disappears And actually, even just a moment ago I think that version of me is already gone forever The me from a moment ago is already dead I’m basically newly born right now Like I’ve been copied or continuously continued, And at some point, it simply stops and breaks So I’m not afraid of death Life doesn’t really continue It’s separated and disconnected That’s how it is from the beginning So the idea of “continuing” itself has no meaning Because it doesn’t truly continue It could be expressed as a drawing Not a straight line, but like dots, dots, dots—disconnected So socially, I may appear continuous But from the perspective of my subjective … →

As mentioned in the link above, I believe the self and the world are completely separate, so religions that exist in this world don’t hold much meaning. The true god must be found within my own self, or created by it. Even gods that exist in this world might have meaning if my self truly believes in them, but to the self, this world is practically fake, isn’t it? So it isn’t rational. In fact, the self is originally discontinuous at every moment. It’s as if it keeps dying and being reborn. Therefore, the idea of eternal life itself has no meaning. From that perspective, even if a god exists, it cannot save me.

The fact that I will grow old and eventually die That no one knows who will die, when, or how Like quantum mechanics (?) it was always like this I just didn’t think about it deeply I didn’t truly feel it or properly understand it It was always like this I have to accept it I can’t remember being born I can’t truly feel that I once did not exist Until the moment of death comes very close, maybe we can’t truly feel that we will die Like inertia Since I’ve been alive yesterday, a week ago, and a month ago I assume I’ll continue living tomorrow, next week, and next month Then one day, when I truly realize that I too must die It feels absurd, shocking, sad, and empty Even though having an end someday is completely natural I think I’m like that It feels like days like … →

If I try, I can definitely grow more But there are fields I simply cannot understand no matter how hard I try And there are also fields that I have no interest or curiosity in from the start Humans are born into society, and we learn far more after birth than what we are given as instincts So it’s easy to fall into the illusion that we can understand anything if we learn it I think there are limits to what humans can understand in the first place In other words, from birth, what we can perceive and what we cannot is already determined For example, no matter how hard I try, I cannot develop absolute pitch We tend to think we are all living in the same world But in reality, the world each of us sees is different (This reminds me of “GOGOTOHell! – Why My Death Is … →

People often say that life is empty and meaningless I used to think that too But at some point, that idea suddenly started to feel strange Why is it empty? “If you live diligently, what’s the point? In the end, everything disappears when you die…” That’s probably what it means But isn’t that just a misunderstanding? Isn’t it simply that we once assumed there was some other kind of meaning, and then realized there wasn’t? For example, maybe I failed to fully consider that I would grow old and die Or I believed that what I achieved through effort would last forever The meaning of life is simply in the present moment, in life itself (if you think about it, it would be strange if it were elsewhere) We don’t live for something else, but should focus on the present we are living When you start to think this way, … →